How coaching changed my life

I did it and so can you.

I didn’t know my limiting learned beliefs, fear-based conditioning, and lack of self- worth were creating challenges in my life, that I was creating a life based on negative conditioning from childhood and past experiences. I became frustrated, negative, disconnected and was living on auto- pilot. A viscous cycle that I now know was unnecessary but sadly, is the experience for many people.

It does not have to be this way.

How did I break free of this cycle and begin to lead a life that feeds my soul, on my own terms, with the past in the past and not living anxiously about tomorrow?

With support. And love (for myself). And accountability. Learned from a loving coach who has guided, listened, challenged and above all believed in me because of her unshakable belief and knowing that all humans are supposed to live fulfilled, happy, and gracious lives.

Make no mistake you can change your life without the support of a coach, I did to a certain degree and consciously changed the trajectory of my life, but my deep-seated unconscious conditioned beliefs kept me repeating unhealthy patterns that were making me deeply unhappy.

Without having the support and knowledge that my past challenges/ experiences, thought patterns and beliefs determine our future experiences, unless we take control of our conscious minds, I was unable to help myself truly and meaningfully.

Reading and educating myself did help but not until I started working with my coach, did real change happen.

My experience working with my coach, as well as the many challenges experienced (which I now understand were a product of my own fear-based negative thinking) have made me want to help other people and to be there as a coach for others who are committed to working towards their goals or being a better version of themselves. 

Who am I?

 My name is Cindy Kidger and I am a recovering co-dependent, I also am healing from living with body dysmorphia for most of my life. From the outside, I appeared to have it all together, but my high level of performance was well-disguised high-level anxiety which stemmed from a need to control everything going on around me to make sense of my world.

We give it labels – high-functioning, perfectionism, A-type personality, all such positive terms for chronic anxiety, a debilitating condition that robs you of the joy of life.

This is how I lived until it all caught up with me and I made the decision (after much work!) to be happy (not perfect), true to myself and find my reason for being on this earth. It wasn’t as easy as just a decision to change unfortunately!

It took me 13 years to slowly recognize my unhealthy patterns, triggers, re-learn many lessons (urgh!), working with several business and life coaches until I finally could start to learn to listen to my own guidance system, and change my life. 

My change started with a feeling of knowing that deep down that there was more to life than the hamster wheel of working myself to the bone, only living for the weekends so that I could curl up on my bed and sleep.

The pressures of saying yes when I meant no, people-pleasing, the endless peer pressure, feeling judged, and not knowing how to do deal with toxic people both at work and socially eventually lead to a burnout. A bitter pill to swallow for an A-type, super organized, perfectionist.

 I am slowly learning to please me first, knowing that only by really loving, accepting and being grateful for myself, my unique-ness, my quirks, and those interesting parts of me, that can I be a better and loving wife, mother, stepparent, sister, friend etc.

I am also learning to bring balance to my work, my emotions, and my life – I of course do have moments when the pressures of life threaten to allow my anxiety to over-whelm me, but that is when I lean heavily on my coach!

I have always loved helping people feel better about themselves and love nothing better than when things are going well for my friends, family, and clients.

My coaching practice through my Yoga Therapy work, Yoga, meditation and breathwork classes, workshops, and retreats, fill my cup knowing I am making a difference to people.

I am married to a wonderful and gentle entrepreneur-dairy farmer and am blessed with a son and two bonus daughters.

I am committed to being the best version of myself – both for me, honoring this body my soul chose to experience my time here on earth in, and for the people (and pets!) in my life.

If you would like to learn how to break free of the chains that stop you from being the best version of yourself, contact me on betterbeingscoaching@gmail.com